A quick announcement before I begin today’s post – My new book, Boundless, is now available for ordering!
After a wonderful response during the pre-order phase, I finally have the book in my hands and am shipping it out quickly. If you’d like to get your copy, click here to order now. You can also enjoy lower prices on multiple-copy orders.
Plus, I’m offering a special combo discount if you order Boundless along with my first book, The Sketchbook of Wisdom. Click here to order your set.
Growing up in India, we’re taught early that money is serious business. Whether it’s our elders chanting “paise ped pe nahi ugte” (money doesn’t grow on trees), or the unspoken pressure to earn well, save religiously, and buy a house before 35, financial responsibility is part of our DNA.
By the time you hit your 40s, you’ve likely made some of life’s biggest financial decisions. You’ve taken a home loan, invested in gold, started saving for your children’s education, maybe even planned your retirement.
But this decade also brings reflection. You start questioning old money habits. You revisit long-held beliefs. You move from just “accumulating” to wondering what it all means.
So, if you are in your 40s, or about to reach there, here are 10 money revelations I’ve come to embrace in my 40s. I’ve tried to draw these from Indian realities, our cultural quirks, and a growing desire to lead not just a financially stable life, but a meaningful one.
Let’s go.
1. Saving for your kids’ future shouldn’t come at the cost of your own
Indian parents are wired to sacrifice. We’ll downsize our dreams to upsize our children’s — from IIT-JEE coaching fees to foreign university aspirations, we pour money into their futures.
But by our 40s, a difficult truth emerges. It is that if you neglect your own financial future, which includes your retirement, health corpus, and insurance, you risk becoming dependent on the very kids you tried to protect.
It’s not selfish to prioritise your own financial security. In fact, it’s smart and responsible. Plus, it’s a gift to your children, that you spare them the emotional and financial burden of caring for you later.
Balancing both isn’t easy. But it starts by treating your retirement SIPs and health premiums as non-negotiables, before committing to that overseas MBA for your “raja beta” or “rani bitiya” (dear son or daughter). You can fund your children’s dreams and protect your future, but only if you stop treating your needs as an afterthought.
2. The pressure to “match up” is real, but mostly unnecessary
In India, we don’t talk openly about money, but we constantly judge each other by it. Who bought a new flat in Gurgaon or a villa in Lonavala, who posted vacation pictures from Paris, or whose child got into an IIM or an Ivy League in the US…these things quietly creep into conversations, whether at family gatherings or school WhatsApp groups.
In your 20s and 30s, you feel this pressure to keep up. You want to show the world you’ve “made it.” But by the time you’re in your 40s, you start seeing the cracks.
You realise how many of those people you envied are drowning in EMIs, personal loans, or credit card debt. How many of them are stressed, burnt out, or working weekends to maintain a lifestyle they can’t afford.
And that’s when it hits you that most of the pressure to match up is imaginary. Nobody really cares about your car or your vacation. Everyone is too busy worrying about their own scoreboard.
It’s then that you also realise that true financial freedom isn’t about appearing rich, but about sleeping peacefully without worrying how to fund next month’s EMI.
3. Health insurance isn’t optional anymore — it’s urgent
In your 20s and 30s, you assume you’re invincible. But reality knocks in your 40s. Maybe it’s a surgery in the family, maybe your parents’ hospitalisation, or maybe your own blood test that raises flags.
Either way, you realise that health emergencies are not rare, and they can wipe out years of savings if you’re underprepared.
In India, with skyrocketing healthcare costs (a single ICU admission in a metro can cost ₹5–10 lakh), health insurance is no longer a checkbox, but a key milestone in your personal financial plan. And if you have dependent parents (please do not forget them while listing down your financial priorities), their health coverage, or lack of it, can drastically impact your finances.
If you have travelled by Indian roadways, you may have seen this banner as you enter the bus – “Yatri apne samaan ki khud zimmedaar hai” (the passenger is responsible for their luggage). That’s true of health insurance in India, too. We don’t have social security here, and so, you must take care of your medical expenses on your own.
So, start early, upgrade your health cover thoughtfully, and don’t delay. Even if you feel fit today, be realistically optimistic, for that is what financial preparedness all about.
4. SIPs and gold won’t make you wealthy — behaviour will
By our 40s, most of us have multiple financial products, like a mix of SIPs, stocks, PPF, gold, and maybe a (mis-sold) ULIP or two. But wealth doesn’t just grow from having “the right investments.” Yes, they are important, but not as important as “the right behaviour.”
This is where most people stumble. Not because they picked a bad fund, but because they stopped SIPs during a market dip, withdrew early, or let lifestyle upgrades eat into their surplus.
The tendency to chase “latest tips” or be over-dependent on insurance-cum-investment plans also affects outcomes. The real differentiator, however, is boring, consistent investing. It also is avoiding panic, avoiding hype, and letting time do the heavy lifting.
5. Real financial freedom means saying “no” without guilt
This might be the biggest shift I’ve felt in my 40s: being able to say no — to that high-paying but soul-crushing project, to unnecessary expenses, and to social obligations that drain your energy. This ability, I’ve realised, is the real currency of freedom.
In our 20s and 30s, we’re wired to say yes to everything. We impress the boss, and we chase every raise and designation upgrade. But in your 40s, time becomes precious. You want to protect your energy, your family time, your peace.
The financial realisation is that money isn’t just for buying things. It’s for buying ‘agency’. The ability to walk away. The confidence to prioritise long-term well-being over short-term appearances.
6. Retirement isn’t an age — it’s a number (and a mindset)
If you don’t come from a business family, you may have grown up watching your parents retire at 58 or 60, usually with a pension and a gold watch. That world doesn’t exist anymore.
For our generation, retirement is no longer a date. It’s a number — how much money you need to stop working if you want to. And it’s a mindset — the freedom to live on your terms.
Maybe you’ll want to work till 65. Maybe you’ll want to quit at 50 and start a small business. The point is, retirement is when your investments can fund your life, not when your employer says it’s time to stop.
In your 40s, you need to stop thinking of retirement as “something I’ll figure out later.” Start treating it like the freedom fund it is. Every SIP you do, every expense you avoid, is a ticket to future freedom.
7. The family’s financial well-being goes beyond money
In a typical Indian household, we measure “success” with owning a house, a car in the garage, some gold in the locker, kids sent to good colleges, and later, married off in style. That’s how our families have defined financial well-being for decades.
But when you reach your 40s, you slowly realise something uncomfortable. It is that ticking off those milestones doesn’t guarantee financial peace in the family. What really matters is something most Indian families don’t do well. And that is, well, talking about money.
We’re great at saving it, investing it, and even showing it off at weddings. But when it comes to real conversations — about who owns what, how much is enough, what happens when parents retire, or who’s expected to pay for what — we mostly stay silent. Or worse, we assume.
Parents don’t tell their children what they actually have. Couples avoid money talks until there’s a problem. Siblings quietly carry expectations without clarity. And all this silence becomes financial stress that shows up not on the balance sheet, but at the dining table.
It’s only when you are in your 40s that this hits you hard. You realise how many unnecessary tensions, misunderstandings, and even fallouts happen because nobody sat down and had an honest, slightly awkward conversation about money.
I’ve realised — through witnessing multiple family fights between a few of my cousins and distant relatives — that financial well-being isn’t just about how much you have, but about how openly you talk about it. Transparency, especially among family members, is underrated wealth. It won’t show up on your net worth statement, but it can save relationships and reduce anxiety. Moreover, it makes sure no one’s playing blind when life throws its curveballs.
So, whether it’s about inheritance, aging parents’ care, or even how much pocket money you want to give your kids, start having those conversations. The money is important, but clarity around it is priceless.
8. Wealth is useless if you don’t have the health or time to enjoy it
In our 20s and 30s, most of us run after money like there’s no tomorrow. We convince ourselves that once we reach that magical income level, we’ll finally slow down, live better, take care of our body, and spend more time with family.
But in your 40s, if you pause and look around, you start noticing something unfortunate: some people who ran the fastest now don’t have the health or peace of mind to enjoy what they built. Their bodies are breaking down. Stress has eaten away at their relationships. They have the money, but no time, no energy, and no mental space left to enjoy it. The realisation hits really hard, more so because it’s about your generation.
Remember that you can’t outsource fitness. You can’t buy back lost years with your children. You can’t reverse decades of stress with a fancy holiday.
In India, we glorify the grind. We proudly talk about how hard we work, how many sacrifices we make. But very few people talk about the actual cost of that grind.
Your 40s are a reminder that the “more” you are chasing may not be worth it if you burn out before you get there.
The biggest asset you own is not your portfolio, your property, or your jewellery. It’s your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. It’s your energy, your relationships, and your presence in your own life.
Of course, money matters. But life matters more. Think about it.
9. Don’t postpone all joy — life is happening now
Most of us grew up hearing, “Save for tomorrow. Don’t waste money. Think of your future.” And that’s good advice. But somewhere along the way, many of us turned it into a habit of constantly postponing joy.
We skipped the family vacation because it felt like an unnecessary expense. We kept wearing the same old shoes because “there’s no need to spend.” And yes, we delayed experiences and small indulgences, all in the name of “future security.”
But in your 40s, a stark truth starts tapping on your shoulder: You’ve already lived half your life. The average life expectancy in India today is around 68-70 years. So, statistically speaking, you’re probably well past the halfway mark.
What’s the point of saving everything for “later” if you don’t pause to enjoy now?
The lesson isn’t to become reckless. But it’s about understanding that financial prudence shouldn’t come at the cost of living. Take your family on a nice holiday, have monthly meals with friends, or upgrade something that makes your daily life better. These aren’t financial sins. They’re what you’ve worked so hard for.
In our Indian households, we’re conditioned to delay gratification endlessly. First till your children grow up, then till your home loan is paid off, and then till retirement. But somewhere, you have to draw a line and remind yourself that you are alive today. Your health, your relationships, and your time won’t wait.
Your 40s is the perfect time to stop treating life like a future event. Enjoy the fruits of your hard work, responsibly but joyfully. Because no one on their deathbed wishes they had waited longer to live.
10. Money is not just about security — it’s about meaning
Finally, a revelation that took the longest to arrive for me. In my 20s, money was about ambition. In my 30s, it was about responsibility. Now, in my 40s, it’s become about “meaning” (you may have sensed from my ideas and posts over the past 4-5 years).
You ask different questions now: Am I using money to live a richer life? And not just financially, but emotionally, and spiritually? Am I spending in line with my values? Am I giving enough to others, and to myself?
In India, where we often inherit a scarcity mindset, this shift is hard. But necessary. Because beyond savings goals and tax-saving instruments, money is a medium. Not just for survival, but for significance.
Finally, What Does This All Mean?
Our 40s are often called the “messy middle.” We’re juggling work, children, aging parents, and our own dreams…all at once. But they’re also a chance to rewrite our stories, to shed outdated money beliefs, and to build not just wealth, but wisdom.
We’ve come a long way over the years, from hiding money in steel trunks to managing it through apps. But the real journey is internal…from comparison to contentment…from accumulation to alignment.
So, if you are in your 40s, remember these 10 revelations. Not as rules, but simple reminders.
Your money story is yours to shape. And it’s never too late to change how the next chapter reads.
Also Read:
The Sketchbook of Wisdom: A Hand-Crafted Manual on the Pursuit of Wealth and Good Life.
This is a masterpiece.
– Morgan Housel, Author, The Psychology of Money
